At the beginning of the year, I posted my Relaxed 2018 Goals. Amongst some slightly more superficial aims like painting my nails more regularly (which, just FYI, I am BOSSING), were some that were important not only for my own well-being, but for the strength of my relationships with friends and family. Having not visited home (Newcastle, which is a looonnnngggg way from Brighton where I live now!) in around 3 years, I had already guaranteed to achieve my goal of ‘Remembering my Roots’ by booking a National Express coach up north for the week before Easter. Of course, I was always excited for the trip, but I couldn’t have predicted how much I would need it that week.
I’ve never been particularly open about my relationship on my blog. I’m not exactly sure why – maybe because it’s been there since before I started sharing my life on here; happy and consistent. Late last year, however, my girlfriend and I decided it was time to go our separate ways after almost 4 years together. Nothing happened, nobody did anything bad, and we’re still good friends – we’re even still living together for the moment! 4 years is just a long time, especially when you’re in your twenties, so naturally we’ve grown apart and our needs have changed as time has passed. It’s incredibly sad and tough because there is still a huge amount of love there, but I’d say as far as breakups go it’s been pretty bloody good.
Perhaps as you’d expect, despite this, there have been times when I’ve felt incredibly low, and times when I’ve struggled more than others – and I’m not especially good at voicing this to the people supporting me. The few weeks leading up to Easter were especially difficult, so my visit home couldn’t have come at a better moment, and it gave me so much more than I expected. I was able to take some time to escape, to think (the coach from London to Newcastle gave me PLENTY of thinking time), and to spend time with friends I’ve known since I was young – something I found incredibly comforting with so many drastic changes taking place in my life right now. I’ve always struggled with change, and I think It served as a reminder that no matter what happens, home will always feel the same for me, and some people will always be there no matter what.
This wasn’t quite the blog post I had in mind to tell you about my trip back to Newcastle. I had imagined gushing about all the things I did, places I went and cocktails I drank (all 3 of which happened in abundance!). In truth, though, my trip was also full of reflection, self-growth and important realisations. If you haven’t been home in a while, or to wherever your home comforts happen to be, I can’t recommend it enough – especially if things are feeling a bit up in the air at the moment. I had a wonderful time with wonderful people, and I’ve come back with a wonderful new perspective too.